Accepting My Limitations

This post is a complement to my previous one, titled, “Becoming a Better Worshiper.”

I was having a conversation with a relative a couple weekends ago.  She was discussing how she sometimes doesn’t feel like her pastor’s sermons motivate her, and she leaves worship not feeling energized for the week. Then, the other day I had a conversation with a former pastor who suggested that a pastor’s primary role in preaching should be to motivate.

Should this be the musician’s role as well?  Should this be worship’s role?  I’m inclined to disagree.  I’m convinced that for musician’s and pastors and even worship itself to take responsibility for the participation and motivation of our parishioners and worshipers is to doom ourselves to endless stress, disappointment, and failure.  Hence the title of this post, “Accepting My Limitations.”

It comes down to boundaries.  There is a difference between being responsible to others and being responsible for others.  In other words, my responsibility as a leader is to stay connected to the people, to encourage them, to walk alongside them, to challenge them, but to avoid taking on their personal responsibilities.  If I start taking responsibility for constantly emailing my song leaders to remind them of the schedule I’ve already sent out, or taking responsibility for planning music that will “engage” certain people, or constantly catering to the comments I get from people about how they didn’t like some aspect of worship, I have taken responsibility for them.  What results is leaders under constant stress who feel burned out in the short term, and congregation members who aren’t challenged to grow and mature.

I believe that I, as a worshiper, am solely responsible for my participation and for life-application of the Gospel, and I believe that I, as a worship leader, am responsible for ensuring that I do not take the responsibilities of the worshiper for myself.  The worship leader or preacher cannot and should not be a spiritual motivator.  In an ordination service, the pastor receives his or her stole, a symbol of their office of Word and Sacrament.  What they do not receive are pom-poms; they are not called by congregations to stand on the sidelines and cheer us on as we “run the race.”  They are there to walk along side us with compassion—literally, “with-suffering”—and this is our calling to one another as Christians.

There is a story by David Griebner called “The Carpenter and the Unbuilder.”  The king of a kingdom invites the carpenter to a banquet.  The carpenter spends six months preparing for event: learning about current events, studying the rules of etiquette, etc. Finally he packs his bags and takes off, taking his tools along to build shelter as needed. But when he stops to build shelter, he gets caught up in it.  What begins as a simple shack for a night’s stay becomes an elaborate house under perpetual construction as the carpenter constantly adds on and improves the structure.  The king, recognizing the carpenter’s delay, sends out another citizen whom he invited to go out and check on the carpenter.  This citizen finds the carpenter and challenges him to continue on the journey.  Calling himself the unbuilder, the citizen reminds the carpenter of the journey when he gets distracted, explores options with him when he is overwhelmed by decisions, but never stays inside the shelter with the carpenter, knowing that they must continue journeying to the banquet—the king will keep the food warm until they arrive.

Leaders, like the unbuilder, are not called to make all their people’s decisions, or do all the work.  As John the Baptist said of Christ, “He must increase; I must decrease.”  So it is with leaders and followers.  Leaders walk alongside, explore options, challenge preconceptions and misconceptions, and do their best to avoid getting “caught up” in staying stuck in one place. In the end, it is the people who must choose the path.

So let us take responsibility for our own journey of faith, our own worship, our own service to God and the neighbor, and walk alongside our leaders as they walk with us.  And as leaders, let us take responsibility for our leading, but not for others’ following.